Everlasting Lives

M y p h o t o a l b u m w i t h S t i n g

If there was a soundtrack to my life. It is Sting and the Police.

I met him a couple of times and from a young age, it was the Police when Sting was in there. I have programmes, picture of Sting and I.

It was not groupie type stuff but intellectually I think his music got a vibe to me. He has been a soundtrack to my life and then got to meet him twice.

Fragile. “Nothing comes from violence, nothing ever could”.

As a song I think it is a lovely song for people. I guess there is something quite strong at imagining your funeral and making sure that the song that is being played is the one that sums me up.

Whereas my father was the healthiest man, he died eight years ago, age 66. That was definitely a very big turning point in my life. With my illness progressing and making me weaker, I am sure that subconsciously knowing that my dad was there was a strong source of subliminal support. Whether I would admit to it or not I don’t know but I would definitely recognize it now.

I think what made it easier with my dad, it was at one point, the last point at The Royal Free Hospital in Hampstead. His eyes were closed with a breathing mask on. The other family members left the room to get a cup of tea and it was just me and him. I was talking to him but his eyes were closed.

Suddenly, his eyes opened and we had 10 minutes of me probably talking to him more than I had done in the last couple of years. I suppose I still didn’t believe he was going to die. “Come on you can fight this. I love you” I told him.

It was 10 minutes of magic.

" Come on you

can fight this.

I love you. "

Sometimes I think ‘do they take me seriously ?

I used to call my father ‘Dad’ but they’ve always called me ‘Papa’ and they still call me ‘Pops’ or ‘Papa’ which is kind of bizarre. I never used that name with anyone in the family. I must say I love it because I find it quite endearing. It feels like there is a bit more warmth to it.

It feels warmer.

A p h o t o o f m y d a d

M y W e s t H a m U n i t e d g o o d i e s

I went to Wales to study management and do an MBA, I had the most incredible time at University. I think it was the glory days of my life in all respects. In some ways, and I’ll never know the answers, it kind of saved my life and then defined the course I was going to take for the rest of my life.

My life has changed so much with this disability, with who I was and who I am now, it is so different. I hardly keep in touch with friends from University.

Their world is so different or achieved incredible things in their profession. I just don’t feel I am anywhere near their world. It is no criticism on them. It just that I don’t feel it is relevant or helpful for me.

I might be wrong.

S a n j a y C h a d h a , 4 6

D I A G N O S E D W I T H M U L T I P L E S C L E R O S I S

A p h o t o o f m y s o n s

For me what was a big part of my make up was the football. I supported and still go to all of the games at West Ham United. I think it is a tribal thing, it must be. I feel so at pain and even at joy depending on how well we do.

I don’t expect my children to always have the same passion as me because they were not born and brought up the way I was. The older one, 15, I think is more into girls now but he is a really good player. I think my sons get fed up with West Ham because we are not a great team. But that doesn’t matter, that is our tribe you know.

" My sons get fed up with West Ham because we are not a great team. But that doesn’t matter, that is our tribe you know."

M y d i p l o m a s f r o m t h e U n i v e r s i t y o f W a l e s

" My big concern is for them not

to have had the father that a lot of their friends might have had."

E v e r l a s t i n g L i v e s

b y E l é o n o r e d e B o n n e v a l

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